Friday, June 24, 2005

The Stylus US Singles Jukebox returns to its original format with some exceptionally crappy songs. But I digress...

11. Akon, “Lonely”

It almost validates those months when "Through The Wire" and "Slow Jamz" were inescapable. Almost.

12. Avril Lavigne, “Nobody’s Home”

OMG you mean somebody out there has it worse than Avril!?! No way! That sucks! No, seriously.

13. 50 Cent “Just A Lil Bit”

Wait'll you thee my dit, I'm gonna beat that putsy up.

14. Daddy Yankee feat. Lil Jon, Pitbull & NORE “Gasolina (Remix)”

Yes, yes, reggaeton, I'm curious, fine, Pitbull, love the dude, NORE, yay hooray more but, seriously, "feat. Lil Jon" are the magic words.

15. Bowling For Soup, “Almost”

Fountains Of Wayne needs a really fat dude in the band.

16. Usher “Caught Up”

My balls! My poor balls! *twirls*

17. White Stripes, “Blue Orchid”

Best pout ever.

18. Fat Joe feat. Nelly, "Get It Poppin'"

Some timecard punches are better than others.

19. The Game feat. 50 Cent “Hate It Or Love It”

Forgiving two criminals' self-gratifying rationalizations in the name of hot beats. At least 50's, anyway.

20. Kelly Osbourne, “One Word”

It's one thing to cover "Sunglasses At Night" at your rock shows after announcing you love the eighties. It's another to become Corey Hart. She's done both.

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