When I was in 8th grade, I wrote one of those award show recaps where you mark each minute something interesting happened. I was planning to submit it to the local free arts magazine, though thankfully, I thought better of it. Only thing I remember noting is that Bono's claim that U2 would continue to "fuck up the mainstream" was the show's one saving grace.

Christ.

Every review of a music award ceremony points out the "glorious moment," be it a half-decent song or a surprising declaration from a celebrity. My disdain for TV is pretty extreme these days, and the "(band) subverted the monotony of (show) tonight" meme is aggrivating. I'm not damning people for watching TV (I can still enjoy it as a social activity), its just that claiming your favorite alt-rock group redeemed two hours of insufferability and advertisements by wearing goofy hats while playing their hit is pretty dubious. The last award ceremony I witnessed was that MTV one where the Hives and the Vines did a double-blast of funny aggro. I enjoyed both performances, but what justified enduring the crap around it wasn't Craig Nicholls shrieking like a loon over my preferred guitar tone, but the opportunity to hang out with friends and laugh at it all.

I don't think I even enjoy VH1 Classic much anymore (probably because I have so much of it on tape; I've gotten my fill). I hate surrendering control to a medium with such a disturbingly low batting average - even if someone occasionally plays the maracas.