Some random thoughts about the Siren Festival (btw, BIGTIME ETERNAL GRATITUDE to Geeta for getting me into the press area. You really should be reading her blog if you don't already. You'll learn something!)
1) Symbolic of NYC in general, the press and those who bothered to show up early got a nice earful, while the average festival patron was dealing with a sound system quieter than your stereo.
2) My favorite bands were the ones who did frenetic, angry pop-rawk with keyboards. The Fever, Your Enemies Friends and Electric Six. This genre needs a good label and I vote for the term NU-WAVE. They're already using it in England for some techno absurdities, but I think these fuller, more metal-sounding bands deserve the name even more. Don't be thin and reedy, earn that nu, RAWK THAT SHIT IN YOUR SKINNY TIE! Interpol (who weren't there) count despite the lack of keyboard because they're like an angry Duran Duran. I think the Killers count too. Franz Ferdinand might as well. The trick is that its new wave with a better comprehension of aggro.
3) For some reason Mission Of Burma does a great job of getting me to dance by the end of their sets. Maybe it's because they're so gawky and shamelessly exuberant themselves.
4) While I appreciate And You Know Us By The Trail Of Dead's determination to win by crook if not hook (they might have sounded better if I had stayed in the press area but even then I would have noticed how out of tune the singer was), throwing a case of beer into the press pit was a bit much. Especially when I catch your bassist switching gear before hurling it into drum kit. Stunt bass? What are you, Kiss? The second drummer's chimes were cute. They implied grandeur while being inherently inaudible. Somebody buy these guys a gong.
5) If I ever get to sing lead in a band, I apologize in advance for stealing Dick Valentine of the E6's one-dance-move-per-song shtick. Hearing "Synthesizer," my favorite song of 2003, followed by "Electric Demons In Love," my favorite love song of 2003 in a row almost made me cry.
6) I totally missed Har Mar, Death Cab For Cutie and the Constantines. Only caught the end of Vue, TV On The Radio & The Fever (REALLY wish I'd caught more Fever). Fiery Furnaces, Ponys and Blonde Readhead were the groups I left cuz I had better shit to wait for or see. I kind of wish I could relive the festival again Groundhog Day-style and see what I missed
7) The Thermals need a keyboard bad so they can hop on the nu-wave bandwagon.
8) Reaffirming my rock crit nerd status, Michael Azerrad, Caryn Ganz and what may well have been Chuck Klosterman with new glasses were just as exciting to spot as Nick Zimmer and David Cross. Though Azerrad was watching MoB and wearing a Sonic Youth hat. If his t-shirt also had the name of someone from Our Band Could Be Your Life than that guy needs to cut it out.
9) WEAR SUNSCREEN. I look like a hot dog.
Sunday, July 18, 2004
Friday, July 16, 2004
Thursday, July 15, 2004
Initial reaction to "Vindicated" by Dashboard Confessional: This fucker needs to die. Eventual realization about "Vindicated": this song would be a lot more tolerable if it was sung by Enrique Iglesias.
I thought I heard TV On The Radio on the rawk station. It was just the bridge to "Mama, I'm Coming Home."
I thought I heard TV On The Radio on the rawk station. It was just the bridge to "Mama, I'm Coming Home."
Wednesday, July 14, 2004
VH1 Classic is God.
Godfathers “Birth School Work Death”: It could have been the novelty hit Gang Of Four was lacking (dig that chorus and noise guitar break) if didn’t plod so goddamn much. I’m under the impression Jack Rabid-types in their late 30s have fond memories of these guys. Recently covered by Local H to the glee of Jim DeRogatis (see?).
Keel “Because The Night”: Pathetic. A homely hair-farmer machoes up Patti Smith’s original lyrics (this guy ain’t “in your command,” dig?) while three MORE guitarists head-bang and bash out the same fuckin’ power chords he is. Black and white band footage is intercut with scenes of this Alice Cooper stand-in bitterly staring at a girl’s ass. His shriek of “IT BELONGS TO AAAAAAHHHS!” before the guitar solo should have aped by Natalie Merchant.
Queen “One Vision”: Images from the movie Iron Eagle and behind-the-scenes studio footage are the visual accompaniment to this energetic ode to fascism (“one true religion, one voice, one hope, one real decision”). The bridge delineates the difference between Queen’s views and Nazism (“look what they’ve done to my DREAM!”), which is appreciated. I wonder what Dave Marsh (who called the band fascists five years earlier for stage presence alone) thought of this. The song ends with a demand for fried chicken. People who dismiss these guys after “Another One Bites The Dust” are missing out.
Public Image Limited “Seattle”: The finest PiL song post-Second Edition. Sounds like a U2 collabo. Supposedly inspired by Mark Arm calling John Lydon a sell-out.
Blue Oyster Cult "Joan Crawford": Five guys who looks like high school teachers who wish they could sleep with their students schlep around the garden of an expensive estate while uniformed schoolgirls parade around and ignore the aging sweathogs. Lead singer Eric Bloom seems like Jeff Lynne but less magical. Buck Dharma, who really should have sung more of BOC's tracks, is actually Bruno Kirby and responsible for that inexplicable sound-effect break before the intense bridge. Random shots of Allen Lanier sliding down the side of a wall, the drummer dancing while hitting a cymbal Andy Kaufman-style and a subtle suggestion of cunnilingus (thankfully not involving a member of Blue Oyster Cult). *POSSIBLE SPOILER ALERT* Uniformed schoolgirls with blood stained mouths are really, really hot. As nonsensical and dramatic as the song itself, one of the finest videos of all time.
Godfathers “Birth School Work Death”: It could have been the novelty hit Gang Of Four was lacking (dig that chorus and noise guitar break) if didn’t plod so goddamn much. I’m under the impression Jack Rabid-types in their late 30s have fond memories of these guys. Recently covered by Local H to the glee of Jim DeRogatis (see?).
Keel “Because The Night”: Pathetic. A homely hair-farmer machoes up Patti Smith’s original lyrics (this guy ain’t “in your command,” dig?) while three MORE guitarists head-bang and bash out the same fuckin’ power chords he is. Black and white band footage is intercut with scenes of this Alice Cooper stand-in bitterly staring at a girl’s ass. His shriek of “IT BELONGS TO AAAAAAHHHS!” before the guitar solo should have aped by Natalie Merchant.
Queen “One Vision”: Images from the movie Iron Eagle and behind-the-scenes studio footage are the visual accompaniment to this energetic ode to fascism (“one true religion, one voice, one hope, one real decision”). The bridge delineates the difference between Queen’s views and Nazism (“look what they’ve done to my DREAM!”), which is appreciated. I wonder what Dave Marsh (who called the band fascists five years earlier for stage presence alone) thought of this. The song ends with a demand for fried chicken. People who dismiss these guys after “Another One Bites The Dust” are missing out.
Public Image Limited “Seattle”: The finest PiL song post-Second Edition. Sounds like a U2 collabo. Supposedly inspired by Mark Arm calling John Lydon a sell-out.
Blue Oyster Cult "Joan Crawford": Five guys who looks like high school teachers who wish they could sleep with their students schlep around the garden of an expensive estate while uniformed schoolgirls parade around and ignore the aging sweathogs. Lead singer Eric Bloom seems like Jeff Lynne but less magical. Buck Dharma, who really should have sung more of BOC's tracks, is actually Bruno Kirby and responsible for that inexplicable sound-effect break before the intense bridge. Random shots of Allen Lanier sliding down the side of a wall, the drummer dancing while hitting a cymbal Andy Kaufman-style and a subtle suggestion of cunnilingus (thankfully not involving a member of Blue Oyster Cult). *POSSIBLE SPOILER ALERT* Uniformed schoolgirls with blood stained mouths are really, really hot. As nonsensical and dramatic as the song itself, one of the finest videos of all time.
Tuesday, July 13, 2004
I finally got to hear Fly Or Die by NERD this week, and while its pretty mediocre, I'm disappointed by the humorlessness and/or anger it met from most critics. One of the fascinating things about Pharrell is the mixture of inept absurdity and infectiousness. His word choices are eccentric, often laughable, but never delivered with a blatantly ironic wink. R. Kelly, who has a similar love for the artlessly blunt, sounds both more commanding and good humored. Fly Or Die shows the Neptunes at their most nakedly amateurish and silly; a big-dick Ween. The first three tracks (gotta love the Good Charlotte cameo) and "She Wants To Move" are spirited enough to reward repeat listening (though it's an even bigger mess than "Like I Love You," I couldn't hate on the single once I realized how much fun it would be to sing at karaoke) but the rest is interminable malarkey worthy of the dismissals they've received from most bloggers. I just wish NERD haters didn't come off like such fuddy-duddies.
Aside from solid smashes like "Milkshake" and some Clipse hits, NERD songs appeal more out of endless quirk and novelty than confident mastery. Where most folks try to impress with nuthin'-but-net championship-game 3-pointers, Chad and Pharrell are doing flips off the trampoline in gorilla outfits, more often than not slamming headfirst into the backboard. It's fascinating (and when they hit the ground they do the robot for a sec before trying again) but kind of childish. I suppose folks who previously declared them geniuses would be apt to get bitter and irate over their antics, but personally I'm just glad they're keeping things interesting. They may be assclowns but they aren't no-talent assclowns. I'm guessing that the eventual commercial cold shoulder will inspire them to lukewarm it up, try some obvious hits ("Beautiful" would have been a snore with or without that shit-tacular Curtis Mayfield impression). I'm curious if Fly Or Die will inspire the same amount of bile then.
Aside from solid smashes like "Milkshake" and some Clipse hits, NERD songs appeal more out of endless quirk and novelty than confident mastery. Where most folks try to impress with nuthin'-but-net championship-game 3-pointers, Chad and Pharrell are doing flips off the trampoline in gorilla outfits, more often than not slamming headfirst into the backboard. It's fascinating (and when they hit the ground they do the robot for a sec before trying again) but kind of childish. I suppose folks who previously declared them geniuses would be apt to get bitter and irate over their antics, but personally I'm just glad they're keeping things interesting. They may be assclowns but they aren't no-talent assclowns. I'm guessing that the eventual commercial cold shoulder will inspire them to lukewarm it up, try some obvious hits ("Beautiful" would have been a snore with or without that shit-tacular Curtis Mayfield impression). I'm curious if Fly Or Die will inspire the same amount of bile then.
Monday, July 12, 2004
Click here. Scroll down the list of contributing writers until you get to the name Miccio. Then, if you're me, scream with glee and pride about your little sister's accomplishments.
Sunday, July 11, 2004
So here's the deal. If you send me a mixtape or a mix CD-R or something else awesome, I'll send you the tentatively titled Mark E. Smith And Your Granny Playing Bongos: 20th Century Fall 2CD-R Fall compilation I've made. It consists entirely of songs not found on the new 50,000 Fall Fans Can't Be Wrong 2CD release on Beggars Banquet. It's not in chronological order, since I think its more fun to realize how anything - even your granny playing bongos, as he once noted - is the Fall if Mark's around.
CD1:
1) The N.W.R.A. (live)
2) Wrong Place, Right Time
3) I'm A Mummy
4) Fit And Working Again
5) Bingo Masters Breakout
6) Shoulder Pads #1
7) Birmingham School Of Business School
8) Sons Of Temperance
9) Life Just Bounces
10) Disney’s Dream Debased
11) Frenz
12) Rebellious Jukebox
13) Dice Man
14) Garden
15) Oh! Brother
16) Spinetrak
17) The Container Drivers
18) Stepping Out
19) Strychnine
CD2:
1) Couldn’t Get Ahead
2) Before The Moon Falls
3) Dresden Dolls
4) Look, Know
5) Everything Hurtz
6) Wings
7) Sleep Debt Snatches
8) My New House
9) Words Of Expectation
10) I Feel Voxish
11) Paint-Work
12) Mere Psued Mag. Ed (live)
13) That Man (live)
14) The Steak Place
15) Hey! Student
16) Winter (live)
If you send me TWO CD-Rs or mixtapes, you get a special bonus THIRD disc of Fall goodies!
CD3:
1) Frightened
2) Pay Your Rates
3) I’m Frank
4) Fantastic Life
5) Copped It
6) He Pep!
7) No Xmas For John Quays
8) Lost In Music
9) Room To Live
10) Bill Is Dead
11) Muzorewi’s Daughter (live)
12) Antidotes
13) Various Times
14) Reckoning
15) Birthday Song
16) Jawbone And The Air-Rifle
17) Leave The Capitol
18) Cab It Up!
19) Louie Louie (live)
Comprehensive as fuck, yo. Anybody curious about these folks would be a fool not to submit. Plus you get to subject me to your own sounds of choice. And I promise to listen to it. E-mail away!
CD1:
1) The N.W.R.A. (live)
2) Wrong Place, Right Time
3) I'm A Mummy
4) Fit And Working Again
5) Bingo Masters Breakout
6) Shoulder Pads #1
7) Birmingham School Of Business School
8) Sons Of Temperance
9) Life Just Bounces
10) Disney’s Dream Debased
11) Frenz
12) Rebellious Jukebox
13) Dice Man
14) Garden
15) Oh! Brother
16) Spinetrak
17) The Container Drivers
18) Stepping Out
19) Strychnine
CD2:
1) Couldn’t Get Ahead
2) Before The Moon Falls
3) Dresden Dolls
4) Look, Know
5) Everything Hurtz
6) Wings
7) Sleep Debt Snatches
8) My New House
9) Words Of Expectation
10) I Feel Voxish
11) Paint-Work
12) Mere Psued Mag. Ed (live)
13) That Man (live)
14) The Steak Place
15) Hey! Student
16) Winter (live)
If you send me TWO CD-Rs or mixtapes, you get a special bonus THIRD disc of Fall goodies!
CD3:
1) Frightened
2) Pay Your Rates
3) I’m Frank
4) Fantastic Life
5) Copped It
6) He Pep!
7) No Xmas For John Quays
8) Lost In Music
9) Room To Live
10) Bill Is Dead
11) Muzorewi’s Daughter (live)
12) Antidotes
13) Various Times
14) Reckoning
15) Birthday Song
16) Jawbone And The Air-Rifle
17) Leave The Capitol
18) Cab It Up!
19) Louie Louie (live)
Comprehensive as fuck, yo. Anybody curious about these folks would be a fool not to submit. Plus you get to subject me to your own sounds of choice. And I promise to listen to it. E-mail away!
Saturday, July 10, 2004
I need some help deciding on a name for the 1977-2000 2CD-R Fall comp which I first promised to make in June 2003.
Potential titles:
1) 20th Century Fall: “If we carry on like this we're gonna end up like King Crimson”
2) 20th Century Fall: Tapping Feet To Formless Sound
3) Rebellious Jukebox: 20th Century Fall
4) Can't Dance, Can't Sing: 20th Century Fall
5) Mark E. Smith And Your Granny Playing Bongos: 20th Century Fall
6) Pre-cog Is A Fall Word
7)
8) There Are Twelve People In This World, The Rest Are Ex-Members Of The Fall
9) Mein 2CD-R Fall Comp-feh
Tracklisting up tomorrow. In honor of my incredibly obvious idea being stolen in the time it took me to get my hands on a burner, there's no overlap with 50,000 Fall Fans Can't Be Wrong. The folks who asked for this ages ago will get it for free (they may even get a BONUS 3rd disc! Possibly one of the mediocre post-Brix albums I'm tossing!). Anybody else will have to make me a mix-CD or something equally spiffy in return.
I can't tell you how much I love this burner. I've been missing out.
Potential titles:
1) 20th Century Fall: “If we carry on like this we're gonna end up like King Crimson”
2) 20th Century Fall: Tapping Feet To Formless Sound
3) Rebellious Jukebox: 20th Century Fall
4) Can't Dance, Can't Sing: 20th Century Fall
5) Mark E. Smith And Your Granny Playing Bongos: 20th Century Fall
6) Pre-cog Is A Fall Word
7)
8) There Are Twelve People In This World, The Rest Are Ex-Members Of The Fall
9) Mein 2CD-R Fall Comp-feh
Tracklisting up tomorrow. In honor of my incredibly obvious idea being stolen in the time it took me to get my hands on a burner, there's no overlap with 50,000 Fall Fans Can't Be Wrong. The folks who asked for this ages ago will get it for free (they may even get a BONUS 3rd disc! Possibly one of the mediocre post-Brix albums I'm tossing!). Anybody else will have to make me a mix-CD or something equally spiffy in return.
I can't tell you how much I love this burner. I've been missing out.
Thursday, July 08, 2004
Technicolor is bowing out of blogland. Part of me understands, part of me is glad I'm not going to check in vain for a new post every damn day and part of me is kind of upset. All of me is going to sift through the archive and jot down some artists and songs to hunt down, just in case Jess decides to erase the whole thing. I wouldn't put it past the guy.
Wednesday, July 07, 2004
And yet again even more Anthony-approved Billboard hits.
Franz Ferdinand, "Take Me Out": LEFT! LEFT! LEFT, RIGHT, LEFT! LEFT! LEFT! LEFT, RIGHT, LEFT! Can I just say how great it is that the hipsters are getting on the radio because of danceability and blatant sex appeal? It's the anti-nineties! It's NEW WAVE, baby! I'm lovin' it!
Van Halen, "It's About Time": The classic rock version of "Ch-Ch-Check It Out." I can't be a stickler about slippage when fogeys sound this enthusiastic.
Hilary Duff and her older sister, "Our Lips Are Sealed": ok, it's not on the charts up today, but it probably will be next week. They don't sound like they have an idea what they're singing about, but I'm amused that the teen-pop version actually rocks harder than either the Go-Go's or Fun Boy Three. I don't think you could really fuck this number up anyway.
Franz Ferdinand, "Take Me Out": LEFT! LEFT! LEFT, RIGHT, LEFT! LEFT! LEFT! LEFT, RIGHT, LEFT! Can I just say how great it is that the hipsters are getting on the radio because of danceability and blatant sex appeal? It's the anti-nineties! It's NEW WAVE, baby! I'm lovin' it!
Van Halen, "It's About Time": The classic rock version of "Ch-Ch-Check It Out." I can't be a stickler about slippage when fogeys sound this enthusiastic.
Hilary Duff and her older sister, "Our Lips Are Sealed": ok, it's not on the charts up today, but it probably will be next week. They don't sound like they have an idea what they're singing about, but I'm amused that the teen-pop version actually rocks harder than either the Go-Go's or Fun Boy Three. I don't think you could really fuck this number up anyway.
Tuesday, July 06, 2004
Jefferson Airplane “Stranger”: Marty Balin replacement Mickey Whothefuckever looks like Dave Foley in Bruce McCulloch’s fake mullet and moustache. There is a red door. A white scarf blows off Mickey’s face and he is nonchalant about it. Three guitars are employed. The twin guitar lead intro does NOT achieve Thin Lizzy grandeur. Grace Slick is visibly not well during the second verse. I think Loverboy would have taken this track to a whole ‘nutha level.
A-ha “Take On Me”: The climax is a riveting masterpiece of action-reaction collage worthy of Battleship Potemkin, though I wish the singer held out a roll of Mentos at the end. If an equally passionate animated music video was made between this and Linkin Park’s latest, please alert me to its existence.
Madonna “Open Your Heart”: If I’m not mistaken, this video introduced me to the concept of sex. In some ways I am still that little boy dancing in the front lobby, pestering an elderly Italian man for tickets. Madonna looks fleshy compared to pop stars of today (including herself). This is not an insult.
Cocteau Twins “Crushed”: Liz Fraser communicates with the mothership while the guys (who share similar haircut philosophies with the 19 year old me) explore new dimensions in reverb as green, blue and red lights shine upon them. Pretty.
Flock Of Seagulls “The More You Live, The More You Love”: The song is among their finest; vast new-wave gorgeousness (those spacious guitar notes add up to a single, wistful tear) with Mike Score warning us not to put our hearts in mortal danger. Sadly, the video reveals that the band is aiming for a relatively macho look, as they rock parkas on oceanside cliffs. All that remains of their youthful sci-fi vibe is a single octagon drum and the guitarist’s big sunglasses.
A-ha “Take On Me”: The climax is a riveting masterpiece of action-reaction collage worthy of Battleship Potemkin, though I wish the singer held out a roll of Mentos at the end. If an equally passionate animated music video was made between this and Linkin Park’s latest, please alert me to its existence.
Madonna “Open Your Heart”: If I’m not mistaken, this video introduced me to the concept of sex. In some ways I am still that little boy dancing in the front lobby, pestering an elderly Italian man for tickets. Madonna looks fleshy compared to pop stars of today (including herself). This is not an insult.
Cocteau Twins “Crushed”: Liz Fraser communicates with the mothership while the guys (who share similar haircut philosophies with the 19 year old me) explore new dimensions in reverb as green, blue and red lights shine upon them. Pretty.
Flock Of Seagulls “The More You Live, The More You Love”: The song is among their finest; vast new-wave gorgeousness (those spacious guitar notes add up to a single, wistful tear) with Mike Score warning us not to put our hearts in mortal danger. Sadly, the video reveals that the band is aiming for a relatively macho look, as they rock parkas on oceanside cliffs. All that remains of their youthful sci-fi vibe is a single octagon drum and the guitarist’s big sunglasses.
Monday, July 05, 2004
I have more opinions about shit on VH1 Classic than anything else, so when there's nothing better to talk about I'm going to drop mad science about videos I bothered to tape (though sometimes I was wrong to do so).
Police “I Can’t Stand Losing You”: Three animated blondes in black on an all-red stage. Irreverent lip-sync demeanor meant to offset song’s verbose, psychotic demeanor. Andy Summers looks somewhat more serious during his echo guitar break. Stewart Copeland ends the video by kicking Sting in the ass, which should be the final image of all Police videos.
Run-DMC & Aerosmith “Walk This Way”: Three black guys in cartoonish outfits offend two white emaciated drag queens by smothering the original proto-rap with their sex-free sports-jock holler. The open-shirtted rehab vets notice an adoring crowd and surrender to the wills of a fickle public (not for the last time). Steven Tyler’s steals the show by removing the all-caps from the second line of the chorus hook.
Arcadia “The Flame”: Silly Rocky Horror silliness featuring a silly Simon LeBon and Nick Rhodes, who looks as debonair as a poodle possibly could. Lots of incoherent intrigue. The actors involved at least seem like they’re unembarassed. Fans of “A View To A Kill” will probably the song, which features equally garish noise breaks and a tortured LeBon vocal.
Simple Minds “Don’t You Forget About Me”: This video would be a lot more enjoyable if 1) intended vocalist Bryan Ferry had accepted the task 2) there were even more images from The Breakfast Club 3) I didn’t spend the whole time wondering how the hell a mousy Bono-wanna-be like Jim Kerr got to marry Chrissie Hynde. Does she think Tim Booth of James is attractive too?
Stevie Nicks “Talk To Me”: Stevie’s make-up and nervous facial expressions imply she was pretty deep into the white candy at this time (her nose looks in bad enough shape that we can probably assume this is around the time that her assistant was forced to insert the 100% Pure Colombian rectally). Her long-skirt twirling and hair-tossing is still pretty bewitching from a distance and the song’s declaration of interest is pretty sweet. It would definitely be a perennial on the adult-contemporary radio station of my dreams.
Police “I Can’t Stand Losing You”: Three animated blondes in black on an all-red stage. Irreverent lip-sync demeanor meant to offset song’s verbose, psychotic demeanor. Andy Summers looks somewhat more serious during his echo guitar break. Stewart Copeland ends the video by kicking Sting in the ass, which should be the final image of all Police videos.
Run-DMC & Aerosmith “Walk This Way”: Three black guys in cartoonish outfits offend two white emaciated drag queens by smothering the original proto-rap with their sex-free sports-jock holler. The open-shirtted rehab vets notice an adoring crowd and surrender to the wills of a fickle public (not for the last time). Steven Tyler’s steals the show by removing the all-caps from the second line of the chorus hook.
Arcadia “The Flame”: Silly Rocky Horror silliness featuring a silly Simon LeBon and Nick Rhodes, who looks as debonair as a poodle possibly could. Lots of incoherent intrigue. The actors involved at least seem like they’re unembarassed. Fans of “A View To A Kill” will probably the song, which features equally garish noise breaks and a tortured LeBon vocal.
Simple Minds “Don’t You Forget About Me”: This video would be a lot more enjoyable if 1) intended vocalist Bryan Ferry had accepted the task 2) there were even more images from The Breakfast Club 3) I didn’t spend the whole time wondering how the hell a mousy Bono-wanna-be like Jim Kerr got to marry Chrissie Hynde. Does she think Tim Booth of James is attractive too?
Stevie Nicks “Talk To Me”: Stevie’s make-up and nervous facial expressions imply she was pretty deep into the white candy at this time (her nose looks in bad enough shape that we can probably assume this is around the time that her assistant was forced to insert the 100% Pure Colombian rectally). Her long-skirt twirling and hair-tossing is still pretty bewitching from a distance and the song’s declaration of interest is pretty sweet. It would definitely be a perennial on the adult-contemporary radio station of my dreams.
Saturday, July 03, 2004
Blogging survey taken from Rockcriticsdaily:
1. Do you try to look hot when you go to the grocery store just in case someone recognises you from your blog?
hahaha.
2. Are the photos you post Photoshopped or otherwise altered? Photo blogs take ages to load and piss everyone off.
I don't know. Until today, I've only hyperlinked stuff.
3. Do you like it when creeps or dorks email you?
Yes.
4. Do you lie in your blog?
Sometimes I've settled for statements that oversimplify (sometimes I'd rather be slightly off than vague), but I've never done a 180 from what I believe.
5. Are you passive-aggressive in your blog?
Not often enough.
6. Do you ever threaten to quit writing so people will tell you not to stop?
No, because I don't like it when other people do.
7. a) Are you in therapy? b) If not, should you be? c) If so, is it helping?
a) no b) no. I know what my problem is.
8. Do you delete mean comments? Do you fake nice ones?
I've never had a mean comment (kinda disappointed). No.
9. Have you ever rubbed one out while reading a blog? How about after?
Rubbed one out?
10. If your readers knew you in person, would they like you more or like you less?
Like I'd know.
11. Do you have a job?
Yes.
12. If someone offered you a decent salary to blog full-time without restrictions, would you do it?
That's the dream, really.
13. Which blogger do you want to meet in real life?
Matt Cibula. Geeta Dayal (ok, we've met, but I was drunk and I think all I said was "yeah, nobody agrees with me about Limp Bizkit"). Jess Harvell. Dom Passantino. Hell, every ILXor with a blog.
14. How many bloggers have you made out with?
:(
15. Do you usually act like you have more money or less money than you really have?
less. except when I order pizza.
16. Does your family read your blog?
Yes.
17. How old is your blog?
A year and a couple months.
18. Do you get more than 1000 page views per day? Do you care?
No. I don't REALLY care, but I get giddy when the daily rate increases.
19. Do you have another secret blog in which you write about being depressed, slutty, or a liar?
I am not depressed, not slutty, and not a liar. But it's never too late to learn.
20. Have you ever given another blogger money for his/her writing?
No.
21. Do you report the money you earn from your blog on your taxes?
Yes. All none of it.
22. Is blogging narcissistic?
Inherently.
23. Do you feel guilty when you don't post for a long time?
Yes. In fact I'm going to start blogging daily again starting July 5th (though I don't know if people will enjoy what the fall-back subject will be). As a blog reader, I've been really disappointed when people don't live up to self-announced goals and the like. It's very important for me to try and reward constant readers. I did my 100 Favorite Albums thing in 101 days (I took a day off when I posted my Pazz'n'Jop Comments) and I take pride in that. Of course, perfect attendance doesn't equal good grades.
24. Do you like John Mayer?
Oh, GOD yes. Did you see my Freelance Mentalists piece about him? "Clarity" is the best single of 2004 and if he keeps it up he could drop some classic albums someday. He's easily one of the most promising songwriters of my generation. I've got "Split Screen Sadness" in my head right now and that song is tremendous. It's partially his own damn fault (I would love to slice the SRV-fan out of his brain) but critic-wise he's totally slept on.
25. Do you have enemies?
There was a thread on ILM where a crack I made about Dizzee Rascal made one poster go all Albert Goldman on my ass and a few others announced their disdain for me. It was flattering more than anything because nobody seemed to realize I was just a lazy loudmouth whose opinion doesn't necessarily mean anything. Frankly, hate can be more informative (and even insightful) than admiration. It'd be foolish for a critic to feel otherwise.
26. Are you lonely?
Yes, but only because of distance.
27. Why bother?
Because blogging allows me to separate my desire for expression from outside commercial influences. Plus there's my narcissism.
1. Do you try to look hot when you go to the grocery store just in case someone recognises you from your blog?
hahaha.
2. Are the photos you post Photoshopped or otherwise altered? Photo blogs take ages to load and piss everyone off.
I don't know. Until today, I've only hyperlinked stuff.
3. Do you like it when creeps or dorks email you?
Yes.
4. Do you lie in your blog?
Sometimes I've settled for statements that oversimplify (sometimes I'd rather be slightly off than vague), but I've never done a 180 from what I believe.
5. Are you passive-aggressive in your blog?
Not often enough.
6. Do you ever threaten to quit writing so people will tell you not to stop?
No, because I don't like it when other people do.
7. a) Are you in therapy? b) If not, should you be? c) If so, is it helping?
a) no b) no. I know what my problem is.
8. Do you delete mean comments? Do you fake nice ones?
I've never had a mean comment (kinda disappointed). No.
9. Have you ever rubbed one out while reading a blog? How about after?
Rubbed one out?
10. If your readers knew you in person, would they like you more or like you less?
Like I'd know.
11. Do you have a job?
Yes.
12. If someone offered you a decent salary to blog full-time without restrictions, would you do it?
That's the dream, really.
13. Which blogger do you want to meet in real life?
Matt Cibula. Geeta Dayal (ok, we've met, but I was drunk and I think all I said was "yeah, nobody agrees with me about Limp Bizkit"). Jess Harvell. Dom Passantino. Hell, every ILXor with a blog.
14. How many bloggers have you made out with?
:(
15. Do you usually act like you have more money or less money than you really have?
less. except when I order pizza.
16. Does your family read your blog?
Yes.
17. How old is your blog?
A year and a couple months.
18. Do you get more than 1000 page views per day? Do you care?
No. I don't REALLY care, but I get giddy when the daily rate increases.
19. Do you have another secret blog in which you write about being depressed, slutty, or a liar?
I am not depressed, not slutty, and not a liar. But it's never too late to learn.
20. Have you ever given another blogger money for his/her writing?
No.
21. Do you report the money you earn from your blog on your taxes?
Yes. All none of it.
22. Is blogging narcissistic?
Inherently.
23. Do you feel guilty when you don't post for a long time?
Yes. In fact I'm going to start blogging daily again starting July 5th (though I don't know if people will enjoy what the fall-back subject will be). As a blog reader, I've been really disappointed when people don't live up to self-announced goals and the like. It's very important for me to try and reward constant readers. I did my 100 Favorite Albums thing in 101 days (I took a day off when I posted my Pazz'n'Jop Comments) and I take pride in that. Of course, perfect attendance doesn't equal good grades.
24. Do you like John Mayer?
Oh, GOD yes. Did you see my Freelance Mentalists piece about him? "Clarity" is the best single of 2004 and if he keeps it up he could drop some classic albums someday. He's easily one of the most promising songwriters of my generation. I've got "Split Screen Sadness" in my head right now and that song is tremendous. It's partially his own damn fault (I would love to slice the SRV-fan out of his brain) but critic-wise he's totally slept on.
25. Do you have enemies?
There was a thread on ILM where a crack I made about Dizzee Rascal made one poster go all Albert Goldman on my ass and a few others announced their disdain for me. It was flattering more than anything because nobody seemed to realize I was just a lazy loudmouth whose opinion doesn't necessarily mean anything. Frankly, hate can be more informative (and even insightful) than admiration. It'd be foolish for a critic to feel otherwise.
26. Are you lonely?
Yes, but only because of distance.
27. Why bother?
Because blogging allows me to separate my desire for expression from outside commercial influences. Plus there's my narcissism.
"I finally started checking out people's record collections, just routinely when I walked in anybody's house pulling out their copy of White Light/White Heat (of course EVERYBODY has it, because it's so hip to have) and sliding it out of the sleeve. Yep. Almost nobody I meet has ever much played the damn thing. In fact, all the copies in folks' homes look virgin, like they got played maybe once, right after they were purchased, maybe then not all the way through, and then filed."
- Lester Bangs
music crit nerd. hardcore.
- Lester Bangs
music crit nerd. hardcore.
Wednesday, June 30, 2004
Did anybody else start sweating profusely when they first heard "All Nite" by Janet Jackson? There's few things more enjoyable these days than walking home from work late at night and being bowled over by a new single on the radio. The dark sky, empty streets and deafening-if-you-want-it headphones (which I don't otherwise wear when listening to music - I can only hear out of one ear, I live in mono) are so beneficial to hearing something fresh and audacious. I almost fell down when I heard Usher burnin' hoo-hoo-hoo and nearly started running when Matchbox 20 dignified the gospel choir on their "Downfall" by slamming the guitars and drums back in at full power (ambitiousness looks so cute on these guys, Rob Thomas is the gawky god of vulnerability right now). My face must have been rife with giggly disbelief when "F*ck It" first hit my ears and there may well have been tears the first time I let myself listen to "My Immortal" all the way through. I'm almost grateful the tape deck part of these bastards always gets fucked up (Coby brand portable cassette players, YOU'RE ON MY LIST).
I can understand why people don't like radio if they listen to just one station consistently, but when walking all over town it's really easy to just flip around from station to station finding the right song for the moment. It also helps that I actively anticipate hearing Lil' Jon and "Hey Ya" for the 858483rd time.
Oh yeah, that Janet Jackson track is like Aaliyah with the sex-o-meter jacked up to 11. Scratch that, 13.
Song by a horny woman that I am NOT enjoying: Kimberly Locke, "8th World Wonder."
Will I get the shit kicked out of me if I ever sing Martina McBride's "This One's For The Girls" at karaoke? The verse about 25-year-old girls kinda describes my "type."
I can understand why people don't like radio if they listen to just one station consistently, but when walking all over town it's really easy to just flip around from station to station finding the right song for the moment. It also helps that I actively anticipate hearing Lil' Jon and "Hey Ya" for the 858483rd time.
Oh yeah, that Janet Jackson track is like Aaliyah with the sex-o-meter jacked up to 11. Scratch that, 13.
Song by a horny woman that I am NOT enjoying: Kimberly Locke, "8th World Wonder."
Will I get the shit kicked out of me if I ever sing Martina McBride's "This One's For The Girls" at karaoke? The verse about 25-year-old girls kinda describes my "type."
Saturday, June 26, 2004
um, what I said in the last post about Eamon and Big & Rich trippin' balls?
Click here and click on the video for R. Kelly's "U Saved Me" on the left.
I forgot who the master of the art was.
Click here and click on the video for R. Kelly's "U Saved Me" on the left.
I forgot who the master of the art was.
Singles whose videos I watched on Launch.com that may or may not be Anthony-approved (except Big & Rich and especially the Hives):
Eamon, "I Love Them Ho's": Since I didn't realize it was removed from the clean copy I've got, I originally assumed the word "ho's" (wtf is with that apostrophe?) was added to the original song. I wouldn't have put it past the guy. The video cuts to a snippet of his bitter "Girl Act Right" while he rolls around on a giant bed with six women. No one is trippin' balls harder than Eamon. Respect.
Big & Rich, "Save A Horse (Ride A Cowboy)": these guys are trippin' balls too, but in a totally benign, harmless way. Kid Rock go home. You have been replaced.
Muse, "Time Is Running Out": They offer a pretty slinky verse for a bunch of Radiohead wanna-bes (that drawn-out vocal on the chorus wouldn't have been conceivable before Thom Yorke).
Killers, "Somebody Told Me": Hipsters are still having sex. I used to wonder how people in the '80s could take '80s bands seriously. Is that Hansel on bass? He's so hot right now.
Hives, "Walk Idiot Walk": If I enjoy the rest of the album as much as I dig this track, we may be looking at my favorite album of the year. Peppy songs about stupid assholes? Sign me up.
Eamon, "I Love Them Ho's": Since I didn't realize it was removed from the clean copy I've got, I originally assumed the word "ho's" (wtf is with that apostrophe?) was added to the original song. I wouldn't have put it past the guy. The video cuts to a snippet of his bitter "Girl Act Right" while he rolls around on a giant bed with six women. No one is trippin' balls harder than Eamon. Respect.
Big & Rich, "Save A Horse (Ride A Cowboy)": these guys are trippin' balls too, but in a totally benign, harmless way. Kid Rock go home. You have been replaced.
Muse, "Time Is Running Out": They offer a pretty slinky verse for a bunch of Radiohead wanna-bes (that drawn-out vocal on the chorus wouldn't have been conceivable before Thom Yorke).
Killers, "Somebody Told Me": Hipsters are still having sex. I used to wonder how people in the '80s could take '80s bands seriously. Is that Hansel on bass? He's so hot right now.
Hives, "Walk Idiot Walk": If I enjoy the rest of the album as much as I dig this track, we may be looking at my favorite album of the year. Peppy songs about stupid assholes? Sign me up.
Thursday, June 24, 2004
I love DMX's "Party Up (Up In Here)" - a 1999 track that sounds so crunkily contemporary that I assumed it was a new Bonecrusher single or something - so much that you'd think I'd get my hands on a copy asap. Thing is, I'm worried that the album version doesn't have the moment that sounds like DMX is punching a baby. It's sad when radio edits are more imaginative than the original (there aren't NEARLY as many professional sports sound effects on Missy Elliott's "I'm Really Hot" on the album as there are on the radio). I don't know why State College, PA's 107.9 plays "Party Up (Up In Here)" as often as they do, but I'm grateful.
Hearing "Welcome Back" by Mase on the radio is like that part of the news where they tell you that Koko the panda had twins at the Pittsburgh zoo. Benign but worthless.
Hearing "Welcome Back" by Mase on the radio is like that part of the news where they tell you that Koko the panda had twins at the Pittsburgh zoo. Benign but worthless.
Sunday, June 20, 2004
Reasons To The 5 Boroughs is the best Beastie Boys album since Paul's Boutique:
1) no porno funk jams. Not a single one. No instrumental filler WHAT SO EVER.
2) Fifteen tracks, 45 minutes, goes down easy.
3) Rap is what they're best at, and rap is all they do.
4) Ad-Rock is knocking out some nice, novel little keyb hooks and loops. The dude needs to dole his wares out to fellow vets and underground sensations alike. They'll be grateful.
5) I haven't heard an adult-contemporary rap album this pleasant since De La Soul's AOI: Bionix.
6) Despite the grey hairs, Beastie Boys are still for the children.
Reasons To The 5 Boroughs is the worst Beastie Boys album since Paul's Boutique:
1) Not a single classic, MUST-hear track. Nary a one.
2) Despite mucho well-meaning, nothing on the album sounds as enthusiastic as previous shots at liberalism like "Sure Shot" or "Unite," let alone as spirited as "Hey Ladies." Is it impossible to be PC and still bust out a "No Sleep Till Brooklyn"?
3) Lines about Bush would have a poor shelf-life even if they weren't poorly constructed and stilted. Awkward shit about impeaching Tex is gonna age like Yingling left out in the sun.
4) Rich rappers who take longer to make an album than I do to get a college degree have no reason to sound like they've fallen down and can't get up. It's called digital editing, MCA, ch-check it out.
5) A showboat like Mix Master Mike is too busy cutting faster to help these guys self-edit. I don't know why Mario C ain't around to keep it clean, but an objective ear is sorely missed. Compare this album to something as late as "Alive" and you'll wonder where their sense of pacing has run off to.
6) Rap is what they do best, but the melodicism revealed in Hello Nasty's "I Don't Know" and "Instant Death" is missed, especially when the beats (and their pipes) don't lend themselves to forceful chanting. Even Ian MacKaye's figured that one out.
1) no porno funk jams. Not a single one. No instrumental filler WHAT SO EVER.
2) Fifteen tracks, 45 minutes, goes down easy.
3) Rap is what they're best at, and rap is all they do.
4) Ad-Rock is knocking out some nice, novel little keyb hooks and loops. The dude needs to dole his wares out to fellow vets and underground sensations alike. They'll be grateful.
5) I haven't heard an adult-contemporary rap album this pleasant since De La Soul's AOI: Bionix.
6) Despite the grey hairs, Beastie Boys are still for the children.
Reasons To The 5 Boroughs is the worst Beastie Boys album since Paul's Boutique:
1) Not a single classic, MUST-hear track. Nary a one.
2) Despite mucho well-meaning, nothing on the album sounds as enthusiastic as previous shots at liberalism like "Sure Shot" or "Unite," let alone as spirited as "Hey Ladies." Is it impossible to be PC and still bust out a "No Sleep Till Brooklyn"?
3) Lines about Bush would have a poor shelf-life even if they weren't poorly constructed and stilted. Awkward shit about impeaching Tex is gonna age like Yingling left out in the sun.
4) Rich rappers who take longer to make an album than I do to get a college degree have no reason to sound like they've fallen down and can't get up. It's called digital editing, MCA, ch-check it out.
5) A showboat like Mix Master Mike is too busy cutting faster to help these guys self-edit. I don't know why Mario C ain't around to keep it clean, but an objective ear is sorely missed. Compare this album to something as late as "Alive" and you'll wonder where their sense of pacing has run off to.
6) Rap is what they do best, but the melodicism revealed in Hello Nasty's "I Don't Know" and "Instant Death" is missed, especially when the beats (and their pipes) don't lend themselves to forceful chanting. Even Ian MacKaye's figured that one out.
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