Thursday, December 04, 2008

Got me hypnotized, so mesmerized


#43) Portishead, "Machine Gun"
808s & Heartbreak stripped of its assholery (yay) and Top 40 tricks (I'll live) by Beth Gibbons' wallpaper wail, which the dudes know just how to decorate. Naming the song after the drum pattern suggests they realize the inversion of focus.


#44) David Archuleta, "Crush"
OMG HOW COULD YOU PEOPLE VOTE FOR DAVID COOK? WTF!!! Did you really need another Daughtry???!! HE DOESN'T EVEN SHAVE!!! Archuleta looks like Fievel and sings like James Ingram!!! And you went for Oatmeal Goatee!!! Well LOL on you, our boy's found a pop persona: virgin Enrique!!!! Awww!!! Meanwhile, America's Idol (you suck, America) is like "BUHHHH PHHBBBTTT EYELINER GOATEE PHBBTTT." Why is he not wearing an Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat yet?? He SUUUUUCKS!!! ARCHULETA RULES!!!

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