36.
Hives
"Hate To Say I Told You So"

Because I wanna. Because I'm gonna.

37.
Bowling For Soup
"1985"

I wish Fountains Of Wayne would drop the ironic distance. I wish Blink-182 knew how to write about adults with the same cruel detail they do teens. Cuz I could use more songs like this one.

38.
Big & Rich
"Save A Horse (Ride A Cowboy)"

It's the "Loser" of the oughties (which means they bother saying something)! I guess that whole "worse government means better music" thing is true after all.

39.
Mirah
"Cold Cold Water"

This is what I thought Lee Hazlewood productions would sound like after I read The Unknown Legends Of Rock'n'Roll. They might, actually! I only know "These Boots Are Made For Walkin'." I don't get how Phil Elvrum can record this and bother creating most of the Microphones tracks I've heard. Wouldn't you get bored? Embarassed?

40.
Interpol
"PDA"

Crypto-sexual college rock performed with unprecedented authority. Christgau was right: "at a critical moment in consciousness they exemplify and counsel disengagement, self-seeking, a luxurious cynicism." It's too late for me. Save yourself.

41.
The Darkness
"Growing On Me"

There really isn't enough good-hearted, foxy rock in the world these days.

42.
R. Kelly
"Feelin' On Yo Booty"

"Players wanna play, ballers wanna ball, rollers wanna roll" is rather zen. Stay till the end to find out how many syllables can be crammed into the word "booty."

43.
Deftones
"Change (In The House Of Flies)"

Recommend me some pretty metal! You know, the stuff that sounds like the Red House Painters with more piercings but doesn't sound like Staind.

44.
Spoon
"Everything Hits At Once"

There'd be a lot more indie rock on this list if most indie rock drummers didn't suck. And if most indie rock singer-songwriters didn't suck. And if most indie rock bands didn't avoid pointing out which song is the single.

45.
Sloan
"The Other Man"

Every great band should be given a country that cares. That way they'll keep changing, evolving and occasionally tossing off a near-perfect single that, if properly distributed and promoted, could be a Taco Bell perennial. Thank you, Canada, for making this their first top ten hit anywhere!

46.
Sugar Ray
"When It's Over"

I'll never get how someone could like the Beach Boys and hip-hop but not Sugar Ray.

47.
Kid Rock
"American Badass"

*burp* I'm the shit.

48.
Hot Hot Heat
"Bandages"

Like I care what they really look like.

49.
White Stripes
"Seven Nation Army"

You know that scene in the video where Jack holds out an open palm and shifts to the side? It's kind of weird, kind of hot. Like this song. Like this band.

50.
Basement Jaxx feat. JC Chasez
"Plug It In"

One for me and one for the lady who's sitting in the rain with the tears running down running down her face. She can't see its a masquerade so I'll get this girl together and plug it in, plug it in, baby. *laser beam*

P.S. Timberlake is a dork.

I just watched the video for "My Happy Ending," and I'd guess that Avril Lavigne is my least favorite musical artist at large. All of her singles are unsympathetic pouts about how men continue to fail her, except for the one where she reveals her lack of sympathy for other women ("Sk8terboi," which I deeply regret voting for in Pazz'n'Jop) and the one where she begs for sympathy to justify hooking up with a stranger ("I'm With You," a relatively hate-free fave by default). There are tons of dude bands that are similarly egocentric and cruel, but they're all generic, turgid and forgettable. Avril's work is comparably literal and detailed. On one level it's an artistic achievement, but it also means that nobody represents the kind of self-involved, ultra-critical woman I can't stand like she does. This song is about the guy who refuses to go to Hot Topic with her (oh cuz preppie clothes can't be the real somebody, racoon-eyes). This song is about the guy who got fresh (I like how she floats up to Heaven - where this fault-free angel belongs - at the end of the video). THESE songs are about the guy who didn't live up to her dreams. Neediness and the belief that one's shit doesn't stink are a deadly combination. Especially if you're female, which means I'm actually paying attention. At least Fred Durst puts in goofy raps (she should share the humor behind her Hooters/"Hey Ya" cover on record) and talks about how he should know better. Avril lacks the "fool me twice, shame on me" instinct, and that makes me want to use half-ironic misogynstic epithets.

Are there album tracks that flesh out her persona in a more likable way? Has she ever had a kind word for anyone other than the guy who's "slammin' on MTV"?

New year, new look, same obsessions.


John Mayer Watch 2005!

TUESDAY, JANUARY 4TH
John will be appearing on Country Music Television's Crossroads, 8 and 11pm EST.

MONDAY, JANUARY 10TH
John Mayer
“A Benefit for Broadway”
Hirschfeld Theater | 302 West 45th Street | NYC
7 – 8:30 p.m. | 4A
Be there when the two-time Grammy-winning musician John Mayer meets Jon Pareles, the chief pop music critic of The New York Times. You won’t want to miss this special evening featuring an exciting discussion between the musician and the critic and selected music. And it’s all to benefit The Actors’ Fund Al Hirschfeld Free Health Clinic and MusiCares Foundation … a great cause and a gala finale for The New York Times Arts & Leisure Weekend 2005. (from NY Times)
Reserve Seats: $100

The three best songs off of 2003's Heavier Things: "Clarity," "Bigger Than My Body" and "Split Screen Sadness," can be heard in their entirety on his website. Listen without prejudice. If you checked out my last Stypod spot you would have heard "Home Life," the 4th best track on the album. I'm guessing you didn't. I'm also guessing that John will be CEO of Columbia Records, guest host for David Letterman, editor of Da Capo Best Music Writing 2005 and the guy most likely to have left that used condom on top of your and/or your girlfriend's dresser by Dec 2005. John Mayer pwns all.

(Anthony Is Right, while totally on Mayer's jock, did not condone John Mayer: Blues, a two-night performance of "classic blues" at Webster Hall on December 28th & 29th. I would prefer not to think about what hell that must have been to witness.)

Newer look. Now that I know how to screw with HTML I'm finding it very hard to stop.

While I'd rather this place didn't turn into an Ultragrrrl stalker site, I'm stoked to the gills that she's linked to the Spinto Band. They deserve every bit of love they get. From a post I wrote in September:

Shout-out to the Spinto Band. First time I saw these guys it seemed like Ric Ocasek had seen the Strokes on TRL, decided the world needed to be shown how new wave guitar rock was done, grabbed six of his children, threw instruments on them and made them practice 7 nights a week until their fingers were sore. They were so tight (the cover of "Just What I Needed" was almost fascist in its perfection), so catchy and so enthusiastic (looked like they were 16 AND had choreographed moves) that I assumed an abusive dad had to be behind it all. I've seen them a couple times since, and my admiration has not waned. Their new songs are terrific (as soon as they release some new material I'll undoubtedly be shouting about it somewhere), they aren't afraid to rock the kazoos, their cover of the Motels' "Airport" is so fun I almost don't want to hear the original and if the audience is real nice they'll bust out their breathtaking rendition of "Walk The Dinosaur/Where My Dogs At?" There's MP3s on their site. Check it out.

They're coming back to town on January 21st! I'm going to do my damndest to get to DJ for them.

I'm resisting the urge to share a list of songs that rocked my world this year, but I found a place where you can download Silkworm's "Don't Look Back", so I'm going to blab about that one. Silkworm are one of those consistent indie vet bands I want to like more than I actually do, and this is the first song of theirs since "Couldn't You Wait (Acoustic)" I'm able to remember for more than a day. A chord progression bashed out for six and a half minutes with a simple, emotionally loaded chorus hook and cresting guitar solos. Like the other big Neil Young & Crazy Motorik hit this year, Wilco's "Spiders (Kidsmoke)," I tend to play this on repeat.

P.S. good Silkworm songs sound like good Counting Crows songs. Scary.

New look! What do you think?

(thanks for the advice, Maria)

Awesome new Interpol video! I swiped the link from Ultragrrrl, who posts defensively about the glory of Good Charlotte. Rowr! Makes me wish I was British so she'd make out with me. If I ever meet her, I'll make sure to bust out my Dick Van Dyke "Step in time!" impersonation. I stared at her outside a club once. I like to think we had a moment.

I was hoping "Evil" would be another arty performance video like "Obstacle 2" or "Slow Hands," but this is pretty sweet concept-wise. I love how confidently Paul Banks spouts his awkward romantic statements: "Rosemary, aw, heaven restores you in light." He's said he's a John Frusciante fan and Californication is a believable precedent for Interpol's goofy valentines. Scott Seward, who I should hit up for a mixtape of all the bands mentioned in his TOTBL review, probably agrees.

Ric Flair + Mick Foley = Nick Lowe Letting Himself Go

I can half-understand why someone might go to see him live (he might whip out "What A Fool Believes" for the 2nd encore) but what in blue blazes is up with these Michael McDonald Motown albums? I keep hearing random tracks at Taco Bell (I'm spending half of my xmas money there) and it's quite the bland. Rod Stewart's American Songbook platters benefit from a distinct vocal persona and a wider canon. The Commitments soundtrack was at least attached to a cute concept. What's the Doobie Brother's draw? Are people incapable of picking up Motown budget comps? Yeargh.

August 2005
Michael McDonald, Sub Pop
1. About A Girl
2. Touch Me, I'm Sick
3. Last Man Alive
4. Bandages
5. 47
6. Willing To Wait
7. Such Great Heights
8. New Slang
9. Audrey's Eyes
10. Psychobilly Freakout
11. Wop-A-Din-Din
12. Stabbed In The Face
13. Milez Is Ded

December 2006
Michael McDonald, Matador
1. She's Losing It
2. Motor Away
3. Pat's Trick
4. NYC
5. Sugarcube
6. Fix Up, Look Sharp
7. Break Up Your Band
8. Slack Motherfucker [2007's Merge will feature "Hyper Enough"]
9. Bellbottoms
10. Letter From An Occupant
11. Nude As The News
12. Summer Babe
13. Supernova

Three things:

1. Shout-out to Jefferson, who has revealed that Type O Negative is an exquisite Red House Painters rip-off band. I never would have guessed. Opeth (Led Zep medleys), H.I.M. ("Satan, I like you. Like like."), Slowdive (MBV with fewer vacuum cleaners and more rhythm section) and Isis (Archers Of Loaf???) are great too. This is why I'd rather people play me stuff they like when we hang out than control the stereo myself.

2. Happy birthday to Asa!

3. Happy Holidays to all of you! Keep hope alive in '05!

Posts will be less frequent until 2005. I have a lot of stuff to do and a lot of people to hang out with.

I used to get really angry at my sister when she'd borrow CDs and I'd see them sitting on her stereo and not in their case. I currently have a bunch of CDs spilled out on top of my record player and I need to take care of it.

Here's what was resting there:

CD-R with songs by the Distillers, Dr. Octagon, Eamon, Mark Eitzel, Electric Six, Eyesinweasel, Fastbacks and Flin-Flon

CD-R with songs by Yo La Tengo, John Mayer, NERD and the Nerves

2 CD-Rs of skits from The Best Show On WFMU (thanks, Matthew!) and Chain Fights, Beer Busts and Service With A Grin

Bonecrusher, AttenCHUN!

Donnas, Gold Medal

Fever, Red Bedroom

Girls Against Boys, CD-R of songs from Tropic Of Scorpio, Cruise Yourself, Freak*On*Ica, Series 7 Soundtrack and some b-sides

Al Green, Call Me

HappySincerelyWithoutWax, some crappy promo blech

Hot Snakes, Audit In Progress

Interpol, Antics

R. Kelly, "Thoia Thoing" promo single

Chris Knox, CD-R of songs from Meat, Polyfoto, Duck-Shaped Pian & Gum and Songs Of You & Me

Ted Leo/Pharmacists, The Tyranny Of Distance

Ted Leo/Pharmacists, Shake The Sheets

Travis Morrison, Travistan

Kelly Osbourne, Shut Up!

Swell Maps, A Trip To Marineville

Swell Maps, Jane From Occupied Europe

Tall Dwarfs, CD-R of songs from Fork Songs, 3 EPs and 55 Flavours Of Glue (plus 3 Thin White Rope live tracks)

This Radiant Boy, Shakedown At The Russian Disco

20 Years Of Dischord box set

I need to clear this stuff off so I can play some vinyl. It's been a while!

Ashanti's "Only U" is Mis-Teeq's "Scandalous" screwed and chopped. Think about it, won't you? Thank you.

Please enjoy The Year In Privileged Pop-Obsession or Snarky White Males: Kill Us Now, my 2004 wrap-up piece for Stylus.

Stylus is rolling out their Top 40 Albums Of 2004. My blurb about We Shall All Be Healed is up now. The other one I wrote should be arriving on Thursday.



Happy Birthday, Sara! You are my favorite Philebrity.

Buy the Swell Maps reissues! Back in my freshman year of college, I considered my cassette copies of A Trip To Marineville and Jane From Occupied Europe to be the coolest things I owned and a total redemption of all the time I spent perusing the used tape racks at stores. I wanted to use "Harmony In Your Bathroom" as the theme song for my sole auteurist student film Fat Tony's CANCER!* but needed something on CD so I used the Kinks' "Wicked Annabella," which also opens with a drum solo. Had these CDs been available in 2001, the Swell Maps would have been all over the movie. The photos and the videos are a bit weird for me though; I've never really had visual concept of the Swell Maps. I think I prefered it that way, but these albums are still magnificent. If you've never heard them, they basically sound like pre-CR, CR Pavement if that band had a great rhythm section and a better sense of humor. "Gunboats" is the best Sonic Youth song ever! Maybe! And why is "Let's Build A Car" only available as a video rather than an bonus track? Are they re-releasing Train Out Of It? They better!

Get them now!


* thanks to producer Brian Ritchey for keeping my film up at his site! Check it out if you've got RealPlayer! That's actually me singing over the credits. A little tribute to The Postman, which ends with writer/director/star Kevin Costner and Amy Grant covering "You Didn't Have To Be So Nice" after a bronze statue of him is erected. Make sure you stay till the end!

Often when an indie phenomenon strikes me as notable and ripe for mass success, a polished major-label act reveals themself as a more commercially accessible version of the archetype and makes a mint with it. I love when it happens because it corrobates my belief that the underground act has some element that would resonate with a larger group of people. That's why I did a backflip and said "OMG these turds turned into the mainstream Desaparecidos!!!" when I first saw "Lifestyles Of The Rich & Famous," made Travis Morrison-John Mayer comparisons any time I wrote about either and welcomed the Killers into my Interpol-addicted arms.

There are at least two songs that haven't been mentioned in any best-of-year context here who have a shooting chance of making my top ten. One is Vanessa Carlton's "White Houses," which I think I'd find very Kimya Dawson even if I didn't know Carlton sang on Hidden Vagenda. Her early singles were annoying Fiona-lite (as was the album title, Be Not Nobody) but the detail, insight and heart on this track is far too killer for me to hold anything against her. I'm not going to assume Stephan Jenkins' skeet is to credit for this upswing, since I like this more than anything Third Eye Blind ever did. I love reminders that artists we've dismissed continue to evolve and may one day whack us upside the head with something beautiful. I dig the slow burn success this song seems to be having - I'll be hearing it at Taco Bell for years. You were right about this one, TJ!

There's a smart review of "White Houses" at PopText, a terrific new blog. If you find yourself complaining that there are no mp3s of the songs being discussed, you know you're reading something good.

I'll write about the other song I'm debating wedging into my pazz'n'jop ballot once I buy the band's album.

Guilty Of Being Whine

Good Charlotte!

I put "I Just Wanna Live" on the Stypod (before I knew it was going to be a single!) so I'm not going to submit anything from The Chronicles Of Life & Death for exposure at the Tofu Hut. Plus I can't decide which track is most worth sharing. While I still think the album is a disappointment, I listen to certain songs from it with surprising frequency. I understand why Christgau considers it a total turkey (I'm glad he acknowledges the "good intentions"), but he never had much time for Morrissey or the Cure either. Those artists are responsible for 1/25th of my 100 Favorite Albums list so I'm a little more sympathetic to their disciples. A lot of you dig the insufferable childlike sadsack shitsingers that have inspired GC's latest material too and should realize how much this stuff has in common. So what follows are descriptions of some key not-yet-singles. If any of them pique your curiosity and you can't hunt them down on some p2p program, e-mail me the name of the track you most want to hear and I'll g-mail it to you. Two tracks if you ask nicely. I'm curious what people think about these songs, so review them in the comments box. Be as brutal or kind as you desire.

"S.O.S." - while I was originally annoyed that they recorded their "kill myself" song after their "don't kill yourself" song, I'm now simply impressed by how much this song sounds like what the Morrissey/Jerry Finn collabo should have sounded like. Joel's clearly aping the Mozz's moa-oo-woans about being alo-oo-wone and the blitzkrieg bop's climactic bridge is as musically affecting as anything that sounds like Blink-182 could be. If you can handle nasal and love "The Boy Racer," this track is recommended.

"Ghost Of You" - I sometimes wonder if this is a Limahl cover.

"The Truth" - this is actually the most obvious failure on the album, but a fascinating one: Joel bawling and shrieking for a girl to give him the truth over and over and over and over over a slow piano line. I'm no Plastic Ono Band enthusiast, but if you can still doubt that he's "for real" after this, you've got a heart of stone.

"The World Is Black" - This one's for the Cure fans, the Cure fans of the world. It's like something from Disintegration played at 45rpm.

"Mountain" - While I'm annoyed that Good Charlotte is going all emo, they can do powerwimp better than most. Joel's an overearnest doofus, but he is blessedly free of passive-aggressive macho yeargh: "I wasn't on a mountain/ When it came to me/ All my life’s been wasted/ Chasing shallow dreams...And all these things/ What I've gained/ And what I've seen/ It can’t compare/ To the love that you could give to me." In their Threat cover story the guy says that he's realized that to get through life you should care about everyone as if they were your own children: "If Bush loved the children of Iraq as much as he loved his daughters, he wouldn't have sent our soldiers over there." OOH DON'T YOU HATE HIS FASHION SENSE SO MUCH? THIS IS JUST JUVENILE WHINING! NOT LIKE MY PRECIOUS '80S EEYORES!

I'll do my best not to post about these guys again. At least until they make a new video.

Good Charlotte!

Man, I wish I could figure out how trackbacks work. Writing about my annoyance with the Clover/Dark/Felizitas thing on here is so paggro (I am going to use this term at every opportunity). If I did understand trackbacks, this post would open with the words "RATHER PRETENTIOUS WAY TO AVOID ACCOUNTABILITY, ISN'T THIS, JOSH CLOVER (IF THIS IS YOU)?" so that I'd know the dude would see it. I admit that the Good Charlotte dis is what initially inspired my public anger, but that's not really what's ticking me off. The idea of a white male critic using feminine and ethnic aliases to get away with sloppily (the Aphex Twin?) inflammatory stances seems really pathetic. Also, while the Clover/Dark thing is an open secret to anyone who actually pays attention to pop music criticism, it serves to make anyone who takes one these pieces at face value seem as if they don't "get it." At least those old-school Pitchfork character pieces copped to the fictitious persona. Maybe I don't appreciate the majestic meta of it all, but it strikes me as cowardly and I'm surprised so many people encourage it.

The only other critic I can think of who gets Good Charlotte is Robert Christgau, bless him.

Just to warn you, tomorrow's post is about Good Charlotte too. And to show that I do have a sense of humor about these guys...pleasant dreams.

The first paragraph of my Donnas review for Stylus makes me feel young again. Very young.

Gwen Stefani is going to hell. I'd describe the chorus of "Rich Girl" but I think those of you who haven't heard it should be allowed to live in blissful ignorance. I cannot wait until the Debbie Harry solo-bomb-smackdown lands on her. Yes she's talented (first single was nifty), yes her album probably isn't bad, blah blah, but she's not fascinating enough to really succeed without a couple goofy, amiable guys to provide contrast. The camera is going to miss having someone else to cut to. You could say they need her more than she needs them, but they'll have a much easier time surviving as non-stars.

I'm tempted to say I'd rather buy the inevitable Best Of Bush than hear "Rich Girl" again, but after thinking about how painfully absurd Gavin Rossdale's vocals are (never have I been so sure someone is pretending to be constipated), I'll just say that these two deserve each other.

While checking the increasing thinnage in the mirror at City Lights after getting a haircut, I heard some of the bonus tracks on the Crooked Rain, Crooked Rain reissue at a listening booth. I need to pick this up. There are few albums I have a more sentimental connection to, and hearing new-to-me songs from that era is a pretty powerful experience. I'll save it for xmas break, when my townie friends will be back around to remind me that I eventually did get to live out my "Gold Soundz" fantasy from 9th grade.

Saw copies of Rhythm Of The Saints, a cheap Band comp, Workingman's Dead and Sheryl Crow in the new used pile and asked Tyler if somebody had died. Those aren't albums college students outgrow; those are albums older professionals leave someone in their will. Greg said someone with a kid on his arm had sold them back. "I guarantee he just downloaded them all onto his ipod," he noted.

My response: "Ah, soul death."

I'd just indulged in self-consciousness about balding, nostalgia and cranky technophobia within a five minute period. I was even about to bitch about how I couldn't figure out how to make Soulseek work. It was clear I'd have to complete my transformation into a Gang Of Four lyric and buy something to make myself feel better. Almost picked up the new Placebo compilation (cuz new music is so scary that I'm actually nostalgiac for trends I didn't dig the first time around), but instead I bought Shake The Sheets: exuberant music from an indie vet who has improved his game over time - plus he's balding! The radio station copy wouldn't burn entirely and I'm guessing that was God's way of saying I should finally give Leo a lil' bit of royalty after playing my taped copy of Hearts Of Oak so often.

That's not what I'm listening to right now, though. I'm enjoying a band called the Human Television that my friend Max put on a tape after the Cruising soundtrack, which he grabbed before I could at the big radio record sale a few months back. The soundtrack is filled with trashy throb-rock (much more amusing than the movie) and the Human Television is some terrific old school jangle. I bet the Mystical Beast knows all about these guys - probably has posted three tracks. I should find out more. Update: it turns out that Human Television is a new band. I am flabbergasted.

In short: I feel rather old right now. Apologies to those of you reading this who are considerably older.

Btw, I have no respect for Joshua Clover a.k.a. Jane Dark a.k.a. Felizitas a.k.a. the most chickenshit music critic in history.